The pager woke Ellie from her dream. The memory of it was gone in a second, but it certainly involved Nick. It was a pleasant reverie. The morning was cold. So, Ellie dressed in her uniform but then returned to her warm bed to read for a while. Tyrion lay on the pillow beside hers, while Hannah was draped across the foot end. Ellie didn’t intend to fall sleep, and she berated herself as she hopped on one foot while ramming her boot on the other. The dogs were undisturbed by her fumbling and cursing.

She grimaced when she saw the pager message indicated another priority one. At first, she thought she was having a run of bad luck, but at her Monday night training meeting she learned all the other ambos had DOA cases. Winter was certainly the time of year that many elderly people passed away, and flu was running rampant throughout the community.

According to Merv at communications, the lady in trouble was receiving CPR from a neighbour, even more reason to get to her pronto. This morning Erica was only seconds behind Ellie. They took off with lights flashing and siren blaring. Some people complained about the noise they sometimes made, but neither Erica nor Ellie cared this morning. If they hurried, there was a chance to save a life.

They ran from the ambulance to the house with their equipment and found a middle-aged lady leaning over the recumbent older woman.

‘You’re doing a great job, but have a rest, and I’ll take over.’ Ellie used her shears to cut the clothing from the woman’s chest and continued with CPR, while Erica placed the defibrillation pads.

‘Clear!’ Erica called and delivered a shock. Ellie continued with CPR, but they failed to get a shockable rhythm. They alternated positions every two minutes. One administered CPR while the other breathed for the patient. After almost 20 minutes they knew it was useless.

‘Damn it!’ Erica yelled in frustration.

When a doctor arrived, they cleared their equipment away and waited for the police out on the footpath.

‘I feel like a cigarette,’ Erica said.

‘You don’t really, and if you did, it wouldn’t taste anything like you remember.’

‘I still feel like one.’

The police car pulled up, and Ellie felt a thrill of excitement. Nick was driving. It had been two weeks since she last saw him at the nightclub, but she didn’t phone him. She didn’t want to appear too eager, and now she regretted it. He nodded to her as he walked past, but he didn’t look pleased.

Erica gave her a prod in the ribs with her elbow. ‘Isn’t that the one you fancy?’

‘Yes, but I think I blew my chance.’

‘Go and talk to him. Give him the case details.’

‘Oh, I don’t know. Maybe you should.’

‘No,’ Erica said sharply and walked around to the driver’s side of the ambulance.

‘Shit!’ Ellie cursed.

The doctor was filling out paperwork as Ellie edged beside Nick. ‘I have the details here.’

‘Don’t worry about it. I can get them from the doctor. You may leave.’ He spoke in a sharp tone that was almost rude.

‘I’m sorry, Nick,’ she whispered. ‘I really wanted to call you, but I thought I would seem too desperate.’

He didn’t reply, and her eyes suddenly brimmed with tears. It seemed that was the last thing he expected to see when he finally glanced at her.

‘Hey! Hey!’ he said. ‘Come outside and get some air.’ He nodded to his partner and led her by the elbow out to the street.

‘I’m sorry, Ellie. I shouldn’t have been so rude. I was just…disappointed.’

She tried hard to speak, but her throat felt constricted. She could do nothing about the hot tears that ran down her cheeks. Nick put his arms around her and held her tightly against his chest. She heard the truck door slam and Erica’s approaching footfalls.

‘What’s wrong?’ she demanded. ‘What did you do to her?’

‘Um… I…’ Nick stepped away.

‘It’s okay, Erica,’ Ellie said. She coughed to clear her throat. ‘I just got a little overwhelmed. I feel better now. I’ll be fine. Come on, Erica. Let’s clear the job and get out of here.’

As she turned to go, Nick clasped her hand. ‘Please call me tonight.’

Ellie said nothing. She got into the passenger seat and put on her safety belt. Nick didn’t move, and his dark eyes stared at her. As Erica drove away, Ellie nodded to him. He smiled, and she managed to return the smile before the tears started again.

‘What happened?’ Erica asked.

‘I don’t know. I don’t usually get so emotional. Maybe it’s the culmination of all the deaths we’ve had recently.’

‘Did that cop upset you?’

‘I guess that was part of it.’

‘Bloody men.’ She began a rant that lasted until they returned to the depot, but Ellie didn’t take any notice. Her thoughts were splintered between hope and death. She chewed the quick of her fingernail until she tasted blood.

‘I need to get a grip,’ she said.

‘Go home and put your feet up,’ Erica suggested as she opened her car door. ‘Try to relax.’

As Ellie pulled her car keys from her pocket, their pagers sounded again.

‘Priority two, chest pain,’ Erica read from the small screen.

‘Righto. Let’s see if we can’t help this one,’ Ellie said as they rushed back to the ambulance.